Hang up and drive

November 25, 2009

On October 24, I was heading east on Fort Avenue, over to my favorite strip mall, Southside Marketplace (well, it’s not really my favorite, but I spend so much time over there they ought to rename it “Shut Your Everloving Piehole Marketplace”), when a woman in a white compact car of some sort blew through the stop sign at the corner of Henry Street and East Fort Avenue. Henry Street is one-way northbound. She was bearing to make a right turn, and came within a foot of hitting me. Brakes squealed, as did I. As you probably surmised from the title of this post, she wasn’t watching the road because she was talking on the phone.

How many driving mistakes can you cram into one millisecond? She wasn’t watching the road. She was on the phone. She drove through the stop sign. She didn’t have the right of way. She didn’t look before making the turn.

How fucking important could that phone call possibly be? For that matter, how important do you think you are that you think your pissant phone call is more important than someone else’s life? Or that the other driver should make way for you even though, by three tiebreakers (the turn, the stop sign, and the fact that your street dumps into a larger thoroughfare, my street), you don’t have the right of way? Unless it’s Osama bin Laden telling you where he is, HANG UP THE FUCKING PHONE AND KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD.

Oh, and Happy Thanksgiving.


Okay, so you won’t listen to me. How about listening to John Stossel?